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Deep Dive Into 6 Popular CBD Gummies: The Good, The Bad, and The “OK”

Remember sour worms and gummy bears from good days gone by? Of course you do. The rough texture that becomes slimy and soft as you let stringy pieces of sugar melt away on your tongue…the memories alone make you crave the sweet sensation of these tasty treats.

But as you grew up, people started to tell you that you needed to eat healthier. You can’t eat the junk that comes in a plastic package, because “it’ll rot your teeth and your brain.” Shame on you for even thinking of the delicious goodness of Sour Patch Kids.

CBD gummies, on the other hand, changed the game. Candy, chocolate, and specifically gummies are among the most popular items in the growing market of edible CBD goods. The challenge now is figuring out what’s good and what should get tossed. CBD doesn’t come cheap, so when you’re making a decision about what to buy, don’t be impulsive and more importantly, don’t get ripped off. Make sure you properly vet the brands out there that are pushing CBD gummies.

We know the choices are overwhelming, so we’ve tried tons of different kinds of sour and sugary pieces of CBD candy – bears, worms, frogs and plain ol’cubes. At CBD expositions, samples of products flood convention halls, direct from various CBD retail stores and curated CBD boxes where you get a variety of surprise samples each month. We put together a review to share our team’s consensus of 6 popular CBD gummy brands on the market. Each gummy was evaluated, based on 4 key factors:

  1. Taste/scent – (goal: we would eat or use this if there wasn’t CBD in it)
  2. Price per mg – (goal: doesn’t break the bank, get the best bang for your buck)
  3. Lab reports – (goal: properly tested for undetected harmful ingredients)
  4. Full spectrum/broad spectrum/isolate – (goal: we want that Entourage Effect)

Here are our honest reviews of the best and the worst:

1. Best: CBD NYC Mini 20 mg Bears

At 20 mg each and with 30 pieces per bottle, these gummy bears offer a cheaper price per mg of CBD than any edible we’ve seen ($49.99 retail price for 30 pieces at 20 mg per gummy). On top of getting kudos for being on the cheaper end, these baby bears are super effective and tasty. They come in an assortment of fruit flavors and go a long way to help you ease tension. The teeny tiny size doesn’t make you feel bad about having 2 or 3…or 4. There is no aftertaste or sugar coating which can scratch up your tongue like many gummies out there. These are void of THC and gluten, and sourced from non-GMO, organic USA-grown hemp.

Lab reports are posted on their site, so we knew exactly what we were getting.

These bad boys are broad spectrum, our favorite kind of CBD (more to come on that in a future blog post).

2. Best: Smokiez High Clarity 25 mg Hemp Gummies Chew

Oregon-based Smokiez gummies provide 25 mg of CBD per piece in their chews (10 calories each, including 2 grams of protein). One pack has 10 pieces of chews (gluten-free, dairy-free, vegan and sugar-free options). The soy-free proprietary formula is something special despite being void of THC. These sweets are perfectly cut, soft and chewy. With a shelf-life of 1 year, you are safe to store these without them going bad, although let’s be honest – you’ll likely ravish them much sooner. Our team prefers two pieces in one sitting. The favorites of all flavors are sour watermelon and jamberry (which tastes like a blueberry, strawberry and raspberry mash-up). The least favored among reviewers was straight raspberry. The only downside was that we called in and wanted to find out if these were isolate, broad spectrum and full spectrum. No one picked up their phone – we only got a voicemail box. Note to Smokiez – invest in customer service!!

A single serving is one 25 mg gummy, with only ten pieces per package. Each package will cost you $24.95. Lab results can be found here.

3. Favored, but not a favorite: Upstate Elevator Co CBD Worms 30 mg

The fruity flavor tart worms from this Vermont-based company are awesome. Each wiggly worm has 30 mg of CBD, so they are pretty potent. Also included in one serving is 100% of your daily recommended dosage of Vitamin C, which is always nice. There is no THC or artificial preservatives; other ingredients include organic carrot juice and turmeric. There’s also no hemp aftertaste but lots of sugar on the worms. These are isolate hemp gummies, but we had to call in to find that out. We didn’t find that information listed anywhere on their site.

There’s 30 mg per gummy, and 25 gummies per bottle. Each bottle will cost you $69.99. Lab reports can be found here.

4. Favored, but not a favorite: Kushie Bites CBD Variety Pack

You get 1000 mg of CBD in this $40 variety pack of gummy chews, worms, bears, rings and one big octopus. What’s there not to like? The Colorado-made CBD company hooks you up with so many options with and without sugar on top. Each gummy has anywhere between 25-50 mg of CBD. You get 20 pieces in the variety pack, which equates to about 550 calories. Although they are gluten, fat and dairy-free, these do taste much sweeter than our favorite CBD gummies. The calorie count speaks to that, too. Our favorite in the pack is the rainbow that looks like you twisted up a sugared rainbow sour strip and trimmed it into a few pieces. Keep in mind, these are isolate. We had to call their representatives to figure that out – note to Kushie Bites, list that on your site!!

We found their lab reports here.


5. Needs Improvement: Just CBD 7 mg Emoji Gummies

When you are having a bad day, and are looking for CBD gummies, if they have a smiley face, you expect to start smiling. Just CBD just doesn’t do the trick. Although the branding is cute – these emoji gummies are coated with sugar and the flavors don’t taste very different. The 7 mg of CBD per moji is lower then most edibles so you need to have a lot for them to be effective, and the sugar from 5 or more can be annoying on your tongue. This is not a terrible option for first-timers who want an extremely low dose of CBD per gummy. These gummies have isolate hemp in them – you won’t get the entourage effect, but you will get CBD delivered into your system in its purest form.

These gummies will run you $40, but you can probably find a Groupon deal and get them at a discount. Lab reports are here.

6. Needs Improvement: Joy Organics 20 mg

These 8-ingredient serene orchard gummies have a subtle apple flavor and very hempy aftertaste. The high CBD content coupled with minimal additive ingredients likely create the residual taste after you chew. We wish that Joy would do something about the bitter taste, it’s not a serene flavor despite the clean ingredients and pleasant chew.

A 15-pack with 20 mg per chew will run you $44.95. These are broad spectrum, so you’ll get the benefits of that. But, we advise that you choose one of our favorites and save your money. Lab reports can be found here.

So, that’s a wrap for our gummies post! We hope you liked our breakdown of the best and worst in CBD gummies. Please leave us a comment below! Until next time… 😉

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THC Therapy – Note, This Post Would Only Be Legal in About 13 States

By Morris Henderson

Our former presidents have admitted to smoking marijuana, there is evidence that alcohol is more dangerous for consumers than marijuana, and yet we are still far, far away from decriminalizing (let alone legalizing) THC across the nation.

While I’ll veer away from the political tirade I’d like to go on, I’m going to get down to brass tacks here.  In the words of Rick James (sort of), Mary Jane is a hell of a drug. In a perfect world we’d have an Amazon of THC bath bombs, THC edibles, THC gummies, THC skin creams and THC cosmetics. We can buy alcohol online in 2019 – yes, a beverage that can cause you to become so inebriated and stupid that you break into a bar brawl at 2 A.M. It’s not viewed as high risk, though it does require some licensing. However, you need a specialized merchant service to even do business with something as innocent as CBD.

Let’s talk about a few of the legal products on the market, where to get them and when to use them.

First, I live in Maine and recreational marijuana is not legal in my state.  So, what’s a guy to do?  Obviously, I drive down to Massachusetts and hit up a few of my favorite dispensaries to purchase, eat, smoke and apply my favorite THC products.

Quick disclaimer, y’all.  I do not endorse buying marijuana illegally.  Sure, it’s ridiculous that marijuana is illegal and people have gone to prison for possessing it.  But, street drugs are the real Wild Wild West. You have no clue what’s in your bud, and I suggest staying away from it.  There are plenty of states that have legalized the growth and distribution of marijuana.  Can’t get the recreational kind?  Well, there are a number of ways to get a medical marijuana card.  Just be mindful that if you have a gun license, states like New York will prohibit you from having both.

Anyway, on my last trip to MA I dropped into NETA (New England Treatment Access) in Northampton.  Of course, there was a line to get in.  Since there are only a few dispensaries that have been approved to sell in Massachusetts, there’s constantly people queuing at the doors.  This, of course, is a good sign.  The legitimate dispensaries are taking business away from the illegal distributors – more people are getting their hands on bud that has been tested and regulated.

Once they let me inside, I get on line and their salespeople hand me a menu.  Some stuff is highlighted as just medical, while other stuff is recreational.  There’s a way to order ahead and come pick up your items, which is something I’ll definitely do next time I’m on my way down from Maine.

So, how do I pick my items?  It’s really a matter of what I’m looking for.  Personally, I’m not looking for the purely psychoactive effects of THC.  I do want to relax, but I don’t necessarily want to be high out of my mind.  The D-line lumens are great for a soothing calm – each has 5 mg of THC, and they don’t taste bad.  They’re not the overly sweet gummies you find at CBD stores, they’re really just subtly sweet edibles with a bit of sugary coating.  The packaging is interesting – I don’t know if it’s due to regulations but the packages are pretty low-key.  The gummies are $30, and come in sort of a medicine bottle with labels that are in shades of green.  I’ve noticed that the more frequently I take these, the harder it is to feel any type of high from the lumens.  For instance, the first time I took a gummy, it was an instant high (with just 5 mg!)  The second time I ate one, I didn’t feel a thing.  I need to eat more at the same time or really take time off between chewing on these.

Quick disclaimer on these – do not eat one or two and then even think about driving within a two or three-hour timeframe.  These will hit you later, not immediately. Be safe and responsible when you are consuming a psychoactive substance.

Next, there’s the sucking candy. Yes, there’s sucking candy with THC in it, and it’s FAMAZING. These are called “gems,” and well, what gems they are (sorry for the corny play on words).  I got the 5 MG Watermelon gems, and they hit you within 30 to 60 minutes. Similar to the gummies, you don’t want to take too many of these at once. The THC “taste” is pretty subtle; it’s easy to enjoy these watermelon goodies if you prefer to suck on your THC (heh, heh).

So, that wraps up our “edible edition” of THC Therapy, brought to you by Yours Truly.  We’ll be back with more reviews on SMOKABLE THC (I know that’s what you guys are really here for ;)).

Next time, we’ll bring you the latest and greatest in CBD gummies. Until then!!!

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CBD and EMU for Pain: Interview with CBD District in Sunrise, Florida

When we think about relieving physical pain, we usually opt in to ingestion of a pharmaceutical pill.  What we don’t naturally think about is applying something topically, to our body’s largest organ – the skin.  As the CBD Movement emerged, the range of options for topical creams, oils, salves & rubs to treat pain have matured.

Ralph Minyan, Sales Manager of CBD District in Sunrise, Florida calls CBD “a gift from God”.  He has seen CBD help many customers along with family and friends.  Ralph says the best part about CBD is that “you cant get high – it just helps everything else”.
His father suffered from terrible back pain that caused a lot of trouble falling and staying asleep.  Ralph convinced his dad to apply pain relief rub with a low mg dosage of CBD on his back before bed.  His father started sleeping through the night and noticed far less discomfort.  Once in a while, he now uses an adhesive patch which can provide relief and reduce inflammation for up to 8 hours.  Sometimes he ops out for topical ingestion and takes 600 mg of CBD tincture.

Popular ways to ingest 600 mg dosage of CBD Ralph explains, are through either capsules or tinctures.  “When ingesting a CBD tincture, drop your dosage under the tongue and swish around for 15-20 seconds.  The cannabinoids absorb through your mucus membranes.  It’s one of the fastest ways to deliver the impact of CBD.”

He recalls another story of how his friend claims CBD changed his life.  Dealing with depression for years, this friend did not want to be medicated because of the zombie like side effects to his personality.  After a night of Ralph explaining the research of CBD reducing depression and anxiety, Matthew gave it a shot.  He adopted a 500 mg tincture routine and began to feel a little more uplifted.  He has stuck to his routine after trying it for the first time just this Spring and says it helps him keep a positive outlook. 

After seeing the impact that CBD has had on the quality of life of his father and best friend, Ralph says he “feels so good to be helping, i tell my customers – once you see results you will be as thankful as i am.”  

Ralph’s personal favorite CBD items?  Tea and pain relief cream.  The tea, he says is calming and a part of his bedtime routine.  When t comes to relieving soreness after a workout and fostering faster muscle recovery, he goes for pain relief cream.  “Look for Pain Relief Cream with EMU” he suggests.  “EMU absorbs quickly into the skin and is anti-inflammatory itself.  Add CBD and bam – the the relief rub does wonders.”

EMU Oil is derived from fatty oils of a large Australian ostrich looking kind of bird.  It is known to be a strong agent for relieving muscular aches & pains, arthritis and improving joint mobility.  Just like CBD, EMU is a natural anti-inflammatory agent which quickly absorbs into the skins, acting as a delivery agent for CBD.  When coupled together, this cream has a hard hitting impact.  One of our testers here at Noid Noirx is a chef who often gets attacked by some crackling heated oil in the kitchen.  She applied this cream to a dime sized burn and saw the wound heal after 3 days of application (twice a day).  The best part she says, it that it actually prevented blistering. 

We’ve also seen this cream help folks who suffer from  eczema & psoriasis.  Baby Boomers loved it on their knees and aching joints.  CBD NYC gets a plus in our books as their CBD is sourced from Non GMO, organically grown Hemp.  They are also FDA Registered and GMP Compliant

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PMS Got You Down? CBD PMS Stick will get you right back up.

Like many women, I’ve struggled with abdominal pain & cramping every time Mother Nature makes her monthly check-in. And like many women, I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS), making my time of the month often feel debilitating and miserable (more about living with PCOS). And also like many women, I’ve searched for what feels like infinite solutions to this monthly week of anything-but-fun changes to my body.

Midol, hot water bottles and heating pads all offer relief but have their constraints. I personally do not like taking medicine unless it’s absolutely necessary. I’m always concerned with what chemicals are in the perfectly white little pills manufactured in a lab by large pharmaceutical companies. Growing up, there were also whispers among my girlfriends of the harmful impacts of long-term Midol use. This little pill then became impossible for me to use after I had liver issues resulting from a brief attempt at trying Accutane (acne sufferers – read here for more on my experience). So, I resorted to heating compresses – hot water bottles and electric heating pads. Although they work and are surely warm and cozy ways to address PMS pain, they leave you remote and limit your abilities to keep the pace of your daily grind. In the winter, it’s not so bad because you can stay in and watch Netflix, but who wants to apply heat to your belly in the summer after a grueling day of period pain, a miserable commute and humidity (if you live in NYC like me – that subway smog is really something special). It’s also a depressing and demotivating feeling to be laid out just waiting for the heat to penetrate your abdomen and not feel like a scorned alien is trying to escape through your navel. Then there is also the fun chance of burning yourself, which I was unfortunate enough to experience a few times.

Upon embarking on my journey to try CBD products, I discovered this topical PMS Pain Relief Pocket Stick from Blondie’s Bombs; which, for the risk-averse is an amazing option for menstrual (and endometriosis) relief, containing 150 mg of pure Hemp CBD.

The subtle minty scent mixed with essential oils and menthol crystals makes the fragrance of this product super soothing. The balm itself is smooth and absorbs quickly but if you rub it too roughly against your skin, you’ll have little pieces break off. I like to slowly glide the stick directly across my lower abdomen with a medium amount of force for about 5 minutes, before massaging the substance onto the rest of my stomach. I’ve even tried the pocket stick on other areas of my body where I feel pain and it works just as well. It’s more than just a menstrual pain stick, I’ve used it on sore calves after a long rigorous hike.

What is so wonderful about the packaging of this product is that it fits in your pocket. It’s a compact travel sized stick that you can take with you to work, on vacation, even on a date. You don’t have to feel lethargic and count down the days until your cramps are over. You can use this balm and take control of your period, reducing the pain and feeling empowered.